You Write the Caption: The Streaker Edition
Admit it, you saw the female streaker who ran around Raymond James Stadium and brought excitement to an otherwise boring match. You must have seen the repeated replays as Christian Miles nearly had to excuse himself from the FSC broadcast booth.
Well, now's your chance to re-live it one more time.
No, I won't be showing you a YouTube clip (let's face it, you have already watched it a few dozen times). I'll be bringing you a special edition of You Write the Caption (and no, I haven't forgotten the Beckham/Xavier or Taylor Twellman installments. They're coming). The great folks at ISI Photos were able to capture a quality photo of the streaker's moment of glory and I want you, the SBI Mafia, to lend your creative magic to it.
I won't be offering up one suggestion of my own, but rather an SBI Top Five of caption suggestions. The bar is being set high folks. Bring the comedy and PLEASE try to keep it clean.
Enjoy.
Photo by ISI Photos
5. A U.S. fan brings new meaning to the FULL-BACK position.
4. After watching Robbie Findley and Charlie Davies do such a terrible job against Cuba, Tiffany May shows everybody how you play the wing.
3. Nobody had the heart to tell the young lady that the Mons Venus tryouts were further down the street.
2. A clear offside is complete ignored by the linesman, who was too busy holding the wrong flag.
And the No. 1 caption suggestion for our streaker's run to glory:
1. Sepp Blatter's dream of the perfect women's soccer uniform is realized.
Now it's your turn. Bring the heat.
Ives Galarcep is an American soccer columnist for ESPNsoccernet.com and creator of SoccerByIves.net.
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Tiffany shows the rest of the world the REAL American dream, 15 seconds of fame.
Posted by: gary | March 18, 2008 at 02:52 PM
That "boing" you hear is not the bounce of the ball.
Posted by: markspence02 | March 18, 2008 at 02:53 PM
I thought that the Revs were relaxed on Twellman's uniform, but the Nats are letting him get away with murder.
Posted by: Byron | March 18, 2008 at 02:54 PM
"Streaking": Failure to understand the concept.
Posted by: KingSnake | March 18, 2008 at 02:57 PM
Last name: Client. Jersey #: 10.
Posted by: JayDelight | March 18, 2008 at 02:57 PM
To quote Max Bretos,"Nice Ay-doos".
Posted by: Charlie N. | March 18, 2008 at 03:01 PM
Is that an offsides flag in your pocket?
Posted by: guillermo | March 18, 2008 at 03:02 PM
Brandi Chastain's sports bra finally gets a real workout
Posted by: sidenetting | March 18, 2008 at 03:03 PM
Brandi Chastain's little sister takes it a step further.
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 03:03 PM
Nike, in an attempt to mirror the new environmental consciousness, unveils it's "Global Warming" version of the US Soccer Uniform.
Posted by: g-loff | March 18, 2008 at 03:05 PM
The penalty taking at Olympic Qualifying was so bad Peter Nowak brought in Brandi Chastain to show them how its done.
Posted by: Kevin | March 18, 2008 at 03:06 PM
For the man without $4300 to spend.
Posted by: Whitescandal | March 18, 2008 at 03:06 PM
Frankie Hejduk goes through his paces in Nike's new USMNT warm-up kit
Posted by: Bill | March 18, 2008 at 03:07 PM
Raul to Fidel:
"Damn Fidel do you blame those guys for defecting. Thats a nice piece of USA a**."
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 03:07 PM
1. "Superstar!"
-Sorry, made me think of the SNL skit
2. Closest Jozy Altidore comes to scoring in the group stages.
Posted by: Nick | March 18, 2008 at 03:08 PM
This portion of the match brought to you by Hanes Her Way.
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 03:11 PM
U.S. soccer's last gasp attempt at getting Americans to notice the sport.
Posted by: kpugs | March 18, 2008 at 03:11 PM
Whitescandal's gets my vote for the captions submitted so far!
Posted by: Modibo | March 18, 2008 at 03:13 PM
Tried out for the U23's but was a bust.
Posted by: Charlie N. | March 18, 2008 at 03:14 PM
Only in a nation that was founded by people england kicked out for being too square do we find square streakers.
"i wanna streak, but i would never be naked in front of that many people."
england is disappointed, the 60's are disappointed, her family is disappointed. half-assed effort all around.
Posted by: jayslick | March 18, 2008 at 03:15 PM
What happens to you if you ask Ives about John O'Brian or relegation one more time.
Posted by: g-loff | March 18, 2008 at 03:15 PM
Tiffany May's attempt to "crack" the U-23 Men's starting XI is a total "bust"
Posted by: Bill | March 18, 2008 at 03:16 PM
The Mia Hamm inspired logo for the new women's soccer league soccer is quickly replaced after field research by the accounting firm of Raymond James shows other options are more likely to excite fans.
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 03:18 PM
Later that night Christian Miles fouled her in the box...
Posted by: Charlie N. | March 18, 2008 at 03:19 PM
"Later that night Christian Miles fouled her in the box..."
Nice angle to take, I like.
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 03:20 PM
Haiti's coach throws his clipboard in disgust after his defenders refuse to even cover the "talent" he brought to practice today (pictured above).
Posted by: Dannyc58 | March 18, 2008 at 03:23 PM
Soccer Tip: Never leave your "back-side" open like this unless you want to give up an "easy score".
Posted by: TapocoL | March 18, 2008 at 03:25 PM
After this little Johnny found his calling in life. Soccer field security.
Posted by: David | March 18, 2008 at 03:38 PM
And thus, the world was introduced to the best soccer product the US has produced to date.
Posted by: Eric | March 18, 2008 at 03:46 PM
This is how the string theory applies to soccer.
Posted by: The Fan's Attic | March 18, 2008 at 03:46 PM
FUlham's next signing.
Posted by: Tony in Quakeland | March 18, 2008 at 03:49 PM
And the crowd begins to chant "Show us your T-TS"
Posted by: Gino | March 18, 2008 at 03:52 PM
Assistant Coach to Nowak: "Well you did demand a winning streak."
Posted by: Kosh71 | March 18, 2008 at 03:55 PM
Another victim making a run for it. I told them to not get involved with Taylor Twellman. He makes you wear a flag on your head.
Posted by: MasterShake | March 18, 2008 at 03:55 PM
From Streaker Quarterly:
"Tampa Bay is considered a nice alternative for first-time streakers: nice weather, genial crowds, and a glaring absence of cricket players to lambaste you as you prance around".
Posted by: g-loff | March 18, 2008 at 03:56 PM
Looks, Like Landon will wear anything to get a little closer to David beckham
Posted by: Jesse | March 18, 2008 at 03:57 PM
The Bourbon Street Mardi Bra's take the field in US Open Cup action.
or
The US National Team scores at the Samba Soccer Classic
Posted by: Jim | March 18, 2008 at 04:00 PM
Bretos would have been fumbling like an even bigger idiot than he is if he'd been calling this game!
1.) Max Bretos: "If I'd worn an outfit like that in high school I would have been popular."
or
2.) Camerman: "WHERE'S THE ZOOM BUTTON!! WHERE'S THE ZOOM BUTTON!!"
or
3.) U.S. Soccer tries introducing a new "mascot" in hopes of getting the MTV audience.
Posted by: bill | March 18, 2008 at 04:04 PM
What Ruud Gullit really meant by bringing "sexy football" to America...
Posted by: g-loff | March 18, 2008 at 04:05 PM
Filming begins on the new adult film "Under 23".
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 04:09 PM
Meth-head stripper paid $5 bucks to streak
Posted by: wrc | March 18, 2008 at 04:11 PM
Two words.
Epic Win.
Posted by: Chad | March 18, 2008 at 04:15 PM
The Raymond James Stadium Security finally found a reason to put down the donut and to get in shape.
The Raymond James Stadium event planners finally found a way to get grown men to run around after tying a $50 bill to a woman, after taking the idea from a local rodeo when kids chased the pig.
Posted by: david 09 | March 18, 2008 at 04:17 PM
"Someone help, I just escaped from Chuck Blazer's house."
Posted by: Sinter | March 18, 2008 at 04:18 PM
Another proof that American soccer is rapidly catching up to Europe.
Posted by: Hoch | March 18, 2008 at 04:19 PM
cap her now!
Posted by: adudu | March 18, 2008 at 04:21 PM
Get arrested or sit around and watch these hacks try to finish? See ya.
Posted by: Steve | March 18, 2008 at 04:26 PM
Filming begins on the new adult film "Under 23".
Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 04:09 PM
>>>HILARIOUS!!
Posted by: bill | March 18, 2008 at 04:26 PM
Where exactly do I stake my discovery claim?
Posted by: astute observer | March 18, 2008 at 04:26 PM
Play Harder!
Posted by: therealfan | March 18, 2008 at 04:37 PM