Good afternoon and welcome to the latest installment of You Write the Caption, the contest where we ask readers to submit their funniest captions to go with the humorous soccer-related photos we find.
Congratulations to SBI reader Blake for winning the last YWTC contest, the Liverpool Lovebirds edition. For his win, Blake will receive a free Navy SBI Mafia t-shirt, courtesy of Objectivo Apparel.
The latest installment of YWTC brings us back to Barcelona's thrilling tie vs. Chelsea last week, and specifically the photo is taken from Michael Ballack's enthusiastic complaints to Norwegian referee Tom Henning Ovrebo.
Here is the photo, along with our own caption suggestion:
Referees: The Other White Meat
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Now it's your turn. Submit your best caption for the photo and we will select the best entries and let SBI readers vote on which one they think is the best of the bunch. The winner of the contest will receive a free Navy Blue SBI Mafia T-Shirt from Objectivo Apparel. If you haven't done so yet, order your SBI Mafia t-shirts today.
Post your captions in the comments section below. Fire away.
Wow, I can see the back of my throat.
“I’m German! This is how I talk!!”
“You’re the Worst 3- legged race partner EVER! Slow down I’m full of sour kraut ya know!”
That’s it!! No jersey for you after the game!
GET BACK HERE, I wanna give you a hug dangit!
Do you understand the words coming out of my mouth?
“Like a hungry lion prowling they pitch, Ballack stalks his prey.”
How many fouls are you going to blow. Wait let me translate, How many fouls are you going to blow, bork bork bork.
“Norwegian bald heads truly exaggerate my eyebrows”
Even Hugh Dallas could have spotted that handball
“Atleast Britney waited to shave her head until AFTER she lost all credibility”
Du, Du Hast, Du Hast Mich
“HEY! I’m walkin’ here!”
“When I said stick it up your behind, I didn’t mean mine!”
Ballacks!
Albeit Macht Frei!
I know the President of Hair Club for Men!
GET IN MY BELLY!
As he does his best German-tiptoe behind, it is revealed why his name is Ball-lick.
having little to celebrate at the end of another depressing Chelsea performance, Michael Ballack attempts to lift team spirits by falling in behind the referee and urging Didier Drogba to join his impromptu and ill-advised Samba line.
Michael Ballack prepares to re-create his favorite moment from Mike Tyson’s career.
Hey sexy, turn around let me lick your forehead
Mmmmm, BRAINS!!!!
“Whoa-oh, here he comes…watch out Tom, he’ll chew you up. Whoa-oh, here he comes…he’s a man-eater.”
“Michael Ballack didn’t go German. Michael Ballack went Ballack!”
Can you hear me now?
Ballack auditions for “True Blood” by attempting to suck blood from a referee.
Remember, we invaded you in 1940, and we can do it again!
If we weren’t conjoined twins, I’d kill you!
Chelsea is an English team, not German!
HEY!!! How did you get your head so shiny???
Hey Tom, have you read Twilight
Messi and Iniesta have no chance in our deadly chicken fight! NEIN!!!
“HOW DID YOU NOT GLITTER! MARIAH CAREY WAS AMAZING, SHE DESERVED AN OSCAR!”
“Hey, Vic Mackey. Season 7 sucked!”
By eating your brain, I will then have your power to turn invisible during a Champions League match. Maybe THEN I can impress Hayden Panettiere. Save the Cheerleader, Save the Blues!
Du, Du Hast, Du Hast Mich
Posted by: Pat Pug | May 11, 2009 at 02:56 PM
Instant winner.
I’ve been trying to tell you, one million dollars still isn’t a lot of money these days!
You belong in MLS
“No call? I thought you were a Quisling!”
Just because no-one listens to Smashing Pumpkins anymore doesn’t mean you have to take it out on ME!
Miss one more call, baldy, and I’ll show you Michael Phallic!!
HEY WAIT! Didn’t I see you in the MLS?
Gimmie that headset! I wanna talk to your boss!
or
Tragically for Ovrebo, Ballack finally succumbed to his Transylvanian roots.
or
Transcript from referee voice communications:
Ovrebo: Is he still behind me?
Linesman: Yes.
Ovrebo: Okay what should I do?
Linesman: Keep running.
4th official: Actually it’d be kinda funny if you stopped. You could red card him for running into you.
Ovrebo: Interesting thought…
Linesman: No, probably not a good idea, he looks rabid.
An outtake from the latest in the Bourne Identity series. Here, disguised as a soccer player, Jason Bourne tries to save an innocent ref caught in the middle of the action.
Were you too distracted by the glare off your head to get the call right?
The ref runs for dear life, to no avail, as the ref had to endure something no one should ever experience…Ballack’s attempt at germ-glish
IT’S NOT A TOOOMOR!
But I wanna be the pretty, pretty princess!!!!!
Fears erupt after schwein outbreak at Stamford Bridge.
Wow! This is way better than singing in front of the mirror.
LOUD NOISES!!!
“Next time use a little lubrication!”
TOUCH MY MONKEY!!!
Auditions for the role of Kuato in the Total Recall remake began yesterday. “Open you miiiind Quaid”
Sing with me, Mr. Clean:
Mr. Clean gets rid of dirt and grime
And grease in just a minute
Mr. Clean will clean your whole house
And everything that’s in it
link to i44.tinypic.com
Das ist mein game face. Und even Buffy can nicht save you now!
This is weak.
NEIN!!! NEEEEEIIIIIN!!!!!!
Even Hugh Dallas could have spotted that handball
Posted by: matt | May 11, 2009 at 02:53 PM
WINNER ^^^^^
NOW IS THE TIME ON SPROCKETS WHEN VE DANCE!
michael ballack keeps fit by eating white meat only!!
Do you want to watch twilight later!!!
GET TO ZE CHOPPA
“Gene Simmons has nothin’ on me! Give me some face paint!”
WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT DAVID HASSELHOFF!!!
“Tom Ovrebo does the Icky Shuffle.”
Come back here, I’m not through demeaning you!
“RAWR!”
COOKIE!
Ballack shows the ref his “O” face…
“WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT DAVID HASSELHOFF!!!”
Classic..LMFAO
NOM NOM BALLACK HUNGRY! BALLACK EAT!!
Mr. Clean, your orange scented products are giving me a headache!
Angel finally turned on The Master in Episode 17, Season 2 of “Buffy the Vampire Slayer”
Those Eggs were all lies Tom, They give me no powers, they give me no nutrients.
The doctor said it is not infectious and it will be gone in a week
You wont like me when I’m angry
As Etoo watches from a distance, he begins to better understand why there have been two world wars.
“No matter what I say, or no matter how obnoxious I get, I’m not half as annoying as that Chelsea hack Steven Cohen!”
“Look at how big my mouth is”
Listen I got connections, my brother is Matt Damon!!
I was at Wrestlemania in London, and even that WWE ref would’ve seen those penalties…and he refs a fake sport!
“I thought you loved me!!!”
I loved you in ‘The King and I’.
or
‘Getting to know you, getting to know allllll about you!’
Yul Brynner Jr. in, “Escape from Stamford Bridge”.
Relax, this will only hurt for a moment.
It’s my turn for a piggy back ride!
Have you ever noticed how bald heads suck
“I DON’T CARE IF YOU HAVE BLUETOOTH! GET OFF THE PHONE AND MOVE OUT OF MY WAY!”
Michael Ballack doesn’t want to be fed. Michael Ballack wants to hunt.
I’M NEVER GET TO BE THE LITTLE SPOON!!!
Robo-callers DO call at the worst time:
Ballack: “YOUR CAR WARRANTY IS *NOT* ABOUT TO EXPIRE! IT’S JUST A SCAM! YOU SO MISSED THAT HANDBALL!”
Greg Kinnear’s character, decides to shave his head and follow his new dream of being a soccer ref in the sequal to “Stuck on You”.
“I AM SO EXCITED FOR THIS PIGGYBACK RIDE! CAN I JUMP ON YET?!”
Hey man, I realize I’m not David Hasselhoff but my singing isn’t THAT bad, is it?
Isn’t it normally the catcher who screams in pain, not the pitcher?
nein! das ist nicht ya.
“Wait, wait! I’m only halfway through explaining why I wholeheartedly endorse UEFA’s ‘Respect’ campaign!”
OR
“Listen, my cave troll friend, you’re going to keep hearing me sing Wagner until I start hearing some penalty whistles.”
Since you didn’t call that I am going to run ridiculously behind you to make myself feel better
WAS IST DIES!?
(it’s German, just in case)
“Om nom nom… nothing keeps me energized like referee brains after a long 90 minutes”
“BUT… BUT…. I WANTED TO GO TO ROME!!!!!!!!!!”
“Hey! Give me a yellow card!”
Haven’t you heard of Rogaine? Do you even have eyebrows?!
Yelling at the Ref: making him change his mind since never.
YOU PEED IN MY WHEATIES!!!
“Fears erupt after schwein outbreak at Stamford Bridge.”
“schwein” – brilliant. I was going to do something similar, but you beat me to it. Well played.
I’m stepping down to back this entry.
Hey, Tom, you weren’t kidding! She did wax your head!
I said…you had me at hello.
WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT DAVID HASSELHOFF!
I’m gonna take a bite!
OR
Brain suckers from Mars attack!
I said “Put your right foot in, put your right foot out!” Come on.
What do you mean no call?!?!
You need glasses like joey barton needed Johnnie Cochran!
IM NOT YELLING!!! THIS IS HOW I TAAAALK!
“HOW DARE YOU TALK ABOUT HASSELHOFF LIKE THAT!”
I said I am Hans! YOU are Frans!
I VANNA BE ZEE LEAD!!
“Come on Tom, don’t leave me like this! He meant nothing to me! I swear!
“Vat the hell is broccoli anyway? I kill you with da broccoli”
(link to youtube.com)
Geben Sie die Huuuuuuuuubschraaaaaaaauber!!!
Referee!! How can that be a red card on Abidal??! He didn’t even make contact!
Collina???
“What a race folks! Homo Erectus and Homo Neanderthalensis are neck and neck as they head down the home stretch!”
Michael Ballack’s chronic halitosis sends all parties running for cover.
Ballack: Do you like apples?
Ovrebo: Yeah.
Ballack: Well, I got Hasselhoff’s number. How do you like them apples?
MATT DAMON!!!
This photo accidently captures Ballacks transformation into roboman!
Moments before a horrible remake of “the wordrobe malfunction.”
WIG!
STEVE HOLT!
Ballack has a flashback to his days of doing gay porn…
Hey, don’t you understand? I told you I need to loose this CL final too, but I have to be there!!!
“I only came to the Bridge for a trophy and you ruined it.”
Ballack=Overrated! Go Blues!
Hold that position, I want to give you demonstration of what you just did to my team!
Tom and Jerry live at Stamford Bridge.
Can you hear the words that are coming out of my mouth?!
Are you apathetic to every foul against Chelsea? Now you’re just ignoring me.
I’m gonna go down as the greatest player of my generation not to win the Champions League and it’s ALL YOUR FAULT!
“Ovrebo escapes from Ballack’s operatic stylings.”
It was not the best day for Ovrebo to wear his sauerkraut aftershave and sausage cologne.
Making the Champions League final: So easy a caveman can–erm…nevermind.
Where’s my money man!
No, No Iowa is THIS way…we can be married by sundown!
Why oh why did I not become a dentist instead?
DON’T HASSLE THE HOFF!!!!
HOLD STILL, there’s a bug on your head!
Mills Lane’s transition from boxing to soccer gets off to a rocky start.
ZA GERMANS ARE COMING ZA GERMANS ARE COMING!!!!!
NEVER MIND
THE BALLACKS:
Here’s the
REF WHISTLERS!
NEVER MIND
THE BALLACKS:
Here’s the
Sexy REFS!
Pick either one.
Listen I got connections, my brother is Matt Damon!!
Posted by: DS | May 11, 2009 at 05:19 PM
LOL, i always thought they looked like twins. Glad someone else noticed!
Like the Hasselhoff one, too!
GIVE ME BACK MY SON
I’ve been watchin’ you, Norton…and I KNOW you’ve been watchin’ me.
EA Sports releases a modern version of the classic game, Pac-Man, in which Pac-Man takes on the likeness of soccer star, Michael Ballack, but the little white nuggets Pac-Man feeds on appear exactly the same.
Hey! HEY! I Don’t Suck! I’m playing hurt…
Matt Damon does his Christian Bale impression on the set of Goal 4: The Dream Ends.
nom nom nom
Where’s my money man!