Good afternoon folks. It is time for the latest installment of You Write the Caption.
Before we get to the new photo, I want to congratulate Darwin for winning the previous YWTC: The Josh Wicks edition.
Now, onto this week’s edition. The subject is none other than Brazilian legend Ronaldo, who is in Brazil rehabilitating from his most recent knee surgery. Here is a picture of him resting between workouts:
‘Ronaldo takes a break from practice by sitting on Abel Xavier.’
Now it’s your turn. Give us your funniest captions and please remember to keep them clean.
Fire away.
Ronaldo acts out of how down the toilet his career is
“Exhausted from a hard day of fighting off trannies and hiding from the media, Ronaldo takes a break”
mmmmm….man hooker
To decrease his vulnerability to another knee injury, Ronaldo had surgeons attach a third leg.
oh yeah this will help me get ready for that transvestite. mixing business with pleasure
Ronaldo, proving he did not want the hookers to be crossdressers/transvestites by purposely turning the pointy end of the cone down to sit on it, takes a break from his vigorous rehab session at home in Brazil.
(Long I know…)
Desperate to justify his salary by providing value to the team, Ronaldo offers to serve as a 3-legged stool during practices.
Because of declining play and massive debts owed advisors, agents and friends, it’s obvious that Ronaldo doesn’t even have a pot to piss in.
“Saigon … S**t.”
“Just preparing for those laxatives to kick in…I ‘ll teach them for calling me fat”
That ref sure does look good in those tight shorts!
Ronaldo trying to poop out some of the fat to get his rehab back on track.
Ronaldo crapping out the recently consumed travelocity gnome.
“Hey Becks, you sure they go in this side up?”
The cones later demanded money to keep quiet.
Dejected for falling for the old “its a costume party” gag, Ronaldo sits on part of his Cat in the Hat costume.
Ronaldo has learned on the streets of Brazil the preferable way to sit on a traffic cone
Stunned about another ‘knee’ injury, Ronaldo was asked about the new cast on his heinie. Confused Ronaldo replied, “I was pretty sure I injured my weenie, it keeps swelling up.”
Ronaldo shocks the world by tatooing his dingus orange and white.
“Hey Coach, I told you I really had to go”
or
“Hey coach, this is what I think of your stupid cone drills”
Damn, I miss those trannies.
“So you’re telling me this is all I have to do in that MLS to get $4 million a year?”
Eeeeeerrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhh who…does number…two work…for….plop…aaahhhh.
Nothing to do with captions but thought youd find it interesting none the less Ives.
link to cbc.ca
Carver says that if TFC/MLSE doesnt sign a DP for next season he will leave.
Itll be an interesting season either way.
It opens the door for him to leave as a nice guy who loved the club (which i believe he does) and puts MLSE/Mo in the spotlight. I do think he wants to stay (apparently hes been approached by two teams already and hes declined). Itd be win/win if we did sign an appropriate DP.
In practice, Ronaldo tries to flatten out cones, as he no longer can get around them.
After paying for Ronaldo’s salary, a proper bench was deemed too expensive and cut from the budget….
“RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR….. FFFFFFTTTTT!!!!”
Ronaldo winces, already regretting his Cat-in-the-Hat suppository.
“Ronaldo Contemplates Red Bull New York Move by imagining the meatpacking district.”
“Taco Bell was a BAD choice”
Ronaldo started to regret eating the Cat in the Hat after it took 2 laxatives just to pass the hat.
“Due to the current global financial crisis, Ronaldo has been forced to train as he did as a youth- with a sit and spin.”
“I know they had to cut budget on facilities this year, but this is ridiculous!!”
I am Ronaldio. Me need TP for my bunghole.
I know they’re upset about my weight gain, but making me go out here is over the line!
Damn it, it is going to be LA Galaxy or that New york Redbull both suck this season. ummmm is so hard to think where should I go while I taking a Dump!!!
I always wanted to be a conehead for Halloween.
this is what I think of Beckham time in the Galaxy!!
When asked if Ronaldo had enough left in the tank to be competitive in the MLS he responded, “Are you kidding? I eat MLS-quality defenders for breakfast.” Here’s proof…
“Dis is how we wear hats in brazeeeel, ok ju motha fukas?!”
“Rehab gives me a coner”
Ronaldo thinks, “Ah, the beautiful game, the only place those trannies can’t get me.”
Asshat.
As one can see, Brazil’s space program is light-years ahead of the rest of South America.
With the global financial crisis reaching its boiling point, even Ronaldo reluctantly lent a helping hand by manually drilling for oil with his heiny.
Ronaldo’s character brought back into question as he boycotts practice, demanding Twinkies and hookers that he thinks are women.
Ya know, I think if I spin really fast I could dig a hole to China.
Ronaldo finally feels the effect of eating 10 lbs of candy corn in one sitting.
Porto Potty.
Looking into a crystal ball:
“I.. can… see… Cristiano in 5 years”
Brazilian legend Ronaldo, on the comeback trail, had to stack up sixteen traffic cones to support himself properly
“I bet i can kick a ball right over them mountians”
if only i can get them to pay me just sit here and take the corners. i’m way to chunky for all this running.
Fat, cold, lonely, constipated and despondent…until Alexi Lalas gets a new GM gig.
Sex with a Tranny:
YOU’RE DOING IT WRONG!!
“Cat in the Shat”
Chalk one up to the language barrier. Ronaldo gets “dump scat” out of “dunce cap.”
Ronaldo’s character brought back into question as he boycotts practice, demanding Twinkies and hookers that he thinks are women.
With an MLS transfer looming, Ronaldo trains against the LA Galaxy scout team.
(music inside his head) “outside inside out livin la vida loca”
or my favorite
Internal monologue: “It really stings when I pee. That can’t be good…”
This one was pure glory:
“Ronaldo Contemplates Red Bull New York Move by imagining the meatpacking district.”
I shouldn’t have had that bottle of cachaça for lunch…
“WHO DOES #2 WORK FOR! WHO DOES #2 WORK FOR!”
“Um, you’re supposed to WEAR the dunce cap not SIT on the dunce cap.”
“I shouldn’t have eaten all those pies.”
After being questioned by his Flamengo mates, Ronaldo demonstrates the size of the “third leg” he encountered with his Tranny pals!
Eager to woo Ronaldo to MLS, FC Dallas gifted the Brazilian with a Hoops jersey. When Ronaldo told FC Dallas where to stick, they did.
Sorry that should read:
Eager to woo Ronaldo to MLS, FC Dallas gifted the Brazilian with a Hoops jersey. When Ronaldo told FC Dallas where to stick it, they did.
Ronaldo not liking the new uniform for the 4th division Stalactite Hemorrhoidals
Ronaldo craps where HE wants to crap.
Okay the cone is in, I’m ready for the gerbils.
What you don’t realize is that this is a two sided cone!
Listen… I thought he was a she…
“I need a Red Bull.”
My piles are killing me.
Hollywood hits a new low. On the set of “Austin Powers VI, Bend it like Becks”, Staring Ronaldo and the Travelocity Gnome. “Get in my anus!”
or
Ronaldo and the Travelocity Gnome redefine feltching!
“Ronaldo has obviously learned his lesson…and is no deciding not to take the pointy hard part up the rear…”
Ronaldo on the john? I wouldn’t touch that with a ten foot…oh never mind.
The Abel Xavier Award for least mobile footballer trophy: Less prestigious than the Balon D’Or but much, much easier on the prostate.
Man – even MLS won’t take me.
“A confused Ronaldo was told to sit in the corner and put on his dunce camp.”
er… “After another mistake with his decision-making ability, a confused Ronaldo was told to sit in the corner and put on his dunce cap.”
“You should see the other end”
The city of Milan’s most glamorous crossing guard takes a break on the job
Peter Crouch and Ronaldo ponder what’s left of their careers.
Dunce cap . . . I thought you said “Dump scat.”
Transvestite Hooker – “You’re sitting on the wrong end.”
Ronaldo takes a break from his pole dancing training session.
I wish SBI was a magazine…
First the cone . . . then the POLL! Strange training indeed!
First, the knee injury. Now, hemmroids. What else will keep Ronaldo off the pitch?
Former Brazilian soccer superstar, Ronaldo, who still believes he has a future in football, repeatedly rejected fans’ claims that he’s “lost touch with reality”.
Shortly after, Ronaldo showed up to soccer practice with traffic cones and a javelin.
Abel Xavier = Traffic Cone.
I like Ives best so far.
well, they say you are what you eat, in this case an ice cream cone,
Ronaldo makes a crude attempt at a joke, after being told to “go play in traffic”.
Dejected over his club situation, Ronaldo takes a poop on Danny Califf.
I’d get up and run, but on of these is pointing the wrong way.
“At least this thing doesn’t have a dick.”
I’m referring all of your stupid captions to the Department Of Redundancy Department.
After getting picked after the Orange Traffic Cone in last weekend’s pick-up soccer match, Ronaldo did his best to keep it from happening again.
If you can’t beat them, join them.
Ronaldo studies the pitch in horror as he prepares for the MLS season opener at Giants stadium.
“Ronaldo limbers up before a long night out on the town.”
or
“Doc, I don’t these suppositories you gave me for my knee are working properly.”
or
Ronaldo ponders: “How did I go from 3-time World Player of the Year to coaching the youth academy for the Colorado freakin’ Rapids?”
After being told to “sit on it and rotate” trying to land a contract, Ronaldo contemplates whether the ‘rotate’ part would cause yet another knee injury.
Ronaldo in full-swing of rehabbing his hemorrhoids.
Proof that the fincial crisis has hit Brazil, as legendary striker Ronaldo is forced to use a traffic cone as a porta-potti during training.
For a change, Ronaldo tries sitting on the non-pointy end of the cone.
poor cone
Whaddya mean no trannies after training?
Oh God, please Lord, help me to relase this deamon. Ahhhhh…. Thank you Lord, the most merciful almighty… Eh. Hold on! AAAaaaahhhhhhhhh…. those enchiladas. Thank you Lord.
“If only I had a time machine….”
I hope no one notices I used the corner flag to wipe.
Ronaldo taking a “Califf”