You Write the Caption: The Streaker Edition

Admit it, you saw the female streaker who ran around Raymond James Stadium and brought excitement to an otherwise boring match. You must have seen the repeated replays as Christian Miles nearly had to excuse himself from the FSC broadcast booth.

Well, now’s your chance to re-live it one more time.

No, I won’t be showing you a YouTube clip (let’s face it, you have already watched it a few dozen times). I’ll be bringing you a special edition of You Write the Caption (and no, I haven’t forgotten the Beckham/Xavier or Taylor Twellman installments. They’re coming). The great folks at ISI Photos were able to capture a quality photo of the streaker’s moment of glory and I want you, the SBI Mafia, to lend your creative magic to it.

I won’t be offering up one suggestion of my own, but rather an SBI Top Five of caption suggestions. The bar is being set high folks. Bring the comedy and PLEASE try to keep it clean.

Enjoy.

Streaker_isi_photos

                                                                         Photo by ISI Photos

5. A U.S. fan brings new meaning to the FULL-BACK position.

4. After watching Robbie Findley and Charlie Davies do such a terrible job against Cuba, Tiffany May shows everybody how you play the wing.

3. Nobody had the heart to tell the young lady that the Mons Venus tryouts were further down the street.

2. A clear offside is complete ignored by the linesman, who was too busy holding the wrong flag.

And the No. 1 caption suggestion for our streaker’s run to glory:

1. Sepp Blatter’s dream of the perfect women’s soccer uniform is realized.

Now it’s your turn. Bring the heat.

This entry was posted in U.S. Men's Olympic Team, You Write the Caption. Bookmark the permalink.

116 Responses to You Write the Caption: The Streaker Edition

  1. gary says:

    Tiffany shows the rest of the world the REAL American dream, 15 seconds of fame.

  2. markspence02 says:

    That “boing” you hear is not the bounce of the ball.

  3. Byron says:

    I thought that the Revs were relaxed on Twellman’s uniform, but the Nats are letting him get away with murder.

  4. KingSnake says:

    “Streaking”: Failure to understand the concept.

  5. JayDelight says:

    Last name: Client. Jersey #: 10.

  6. Charlie N. says:

    To quote Max Bretos,”Nice Ay-doos”.

  7. guillermo says:

    Is that an offsides flag in your pocket?

  8. sidenetting says:

    Brandi Chastain’s sports bra finally gets a real workout

  9. CD says:

    Brandi Chastain’s little sister takes it a step further.

  10. g-loff says:

    Nike, in an attempt to mirror the new environmental consciousness, unveils it’s “Global Warming” version of the US Soccer Uniform.

  11. Kevin says:

    The penalty taking at Olympic Qualifying was so bad Peter Nowak brought in Brandi Chastain to show them how its done.

  12. Whitescandal says:

    For the man without $4300 to spend.

  13. Bill says:

    Frankie Hejduk goes through his paces in Nike’s new USMNT warm-up kit

  14. CD says:

    Raul to Fidel:

    “Damn Fidel do you blame those guys for defecting. Thats a nice piece of USA a**.”

  15. Nick says:

    1. “Superstar!”

    -Sorry, made me think of the SNL skit

    2. Closest Jozy Altidore comes to scoring in the group stages.

  16. CD says:

    This portion of the match brought to you by Hanes Her Way.

  17. kpugs says:

    U.S. soccer’s last gasp attempt at getting Americans to notice the sport.

  18. Modibo says:

    Whitescandal’s gets my vote for the captions submitted so far!

  19. Charlie N. says:

    Tried out for the U23’s but was a bust.

  20. jayslick says:

    Only in a nation that was founded by people england kicked out for being too square do we find square streakers.

    “i wanna streak, but i would never be naked in front of that many people.”

    england is disappointed, the 60’s are disappointed, her family is disappointed. half-assed effort all around.

  21. g-loff says:

    What happens to you if you ask Ives about John O’Brian or relegation one more time.

  22. Bill says:

    Tiffany May’s attempt to “crack” the U-23 Men’s starting XI is a total “bust”

  23. CD says:

    The Mia Hamm inspired logo for the new women’s soccer league soccer is quickly replaced after field research by the accounting firm of Raymond James shows other options are more likely to excite fans.

  24. Charlie N. says:

    Later that night Christian Miles fouled her in the box…

  25. CD says:

    “Later that night Christian Miles fouled her in the box…”

    Nice angle to take, I like.

  26. Dannyc58 says:

    Haiti’s coach throws his clipboard in disgust after his defenders refuse to even cover the “talent” he brought to practice today (pictured above).

  27. TapocoL says:

    Soccer Tip: Never leave your “back-side” open like this unless you want to give up an “easy score”.

  28. David says:

    After this little Johnny found his calling in life. Soccer field security.

  29. Eric says:

    And thus, the world was introduced to the best soccer product the US has produced to date.

  30. This is how the string theory applies to soccer.

  31. Tony in Quakeland says:

    FUlham’s next signing.

  32. Gino says:

    And the crowd begins to chant “Show us your T-TS”

  33. Kosh71 says:

    Assistant Coach to Nowak: “Well you did demand a winning streak.”

  34. MasterShake says:

    Another victim making a run for it. I told them to not get involved with Taylor Twellman. He makes you wear a flag on your head.

  35. g-loff says:

    From Streaker Quarterly:

    “Tampa Bay is considered a nice alternative for first-time streakers: nice weather, genial crowds, and a glaring absence of cricket players to lambaste you as you prance around”.

  36. Jesse says:

    Looks, Like Landon will wear anything to get a little closer to David beckham

  37. Jim says:

    The Bourbon Street Mardi Bra’s take the field in US Open Cup action.

    or

    The US National Team scores at the Samba Soccer Classic

  38. bill says:

    Bretos would have been fumbling like an even bigger idiot than he is if he’d been calling this game!

    1.) Max Bretos: “If I’d worn an outfit like that in high school I would have been popular.”

    or

    2.) Camerman: “WHERE’S THE ZOOM BUTTON!! WHERE’S THE ZOOM BUTTON!!”

    or

    3.) U.S. Soccer tries introducing a new “mascot” in hopes of getting the MTV audience.

  39. g-loff says:

    What Ruud Gullit really meant by bringing “sexy football” to America…

  40. CD says:

    Filming begins on the new adult film “Under 23″.

  41. wrc says:

    Meth-head stripper paid $5 bucks to streak

  42. Chad says:

    Two words.

    Epic Win.

  43. david 09 says:

    The Raymond James Stadium Security finally found a reason to put down the donut and to get in shape.

    The Raymond James Stadium event planners finally found a way to get grown men to run around after tying a $50 bill to a woman, after taking the idea from a local rodeo when kids chased the pig.

  44. Sinter says:

    “Someone help, I just escaped from Chuck Blazer’s house.”

  45. Hoch says:

    Another proof that American soccer is rapidly catching up to Europe.

  46. adudu says:

    cap her now!

  47. Steve says:

    Get arrested or sit around and watch these hacks try to finish? See ya.

  48. bill says:

    Filming begins on the new adult film “Under 23″.

    Posted by: CD | March 18, 2008 at 04:09 PM

    >>>HILARIOUS!!

  49. astute observer says:

    Where exactly do I stake my discovery claim?

  50. therealfan says:

    Play Harder!

  51. Charlie N. says:

    I knew the Haitian was bush league…

  52. Danny says:

    Does this flag make me look fat?

  53. Joamiq says:

    No caption, but just wanted to say I think this picture of the incident is even funnier: link to blogs.orlandosentinel.com

  54. j says:

    “The USA’s Gold medal Olympic winning Streak began with this moment,in a qualifier in Tampa,Florida”

  55. ejs says:

    Today, US soccer fans mourned the loss of the defected Cuban players.

  56. j1m says:

    Not only did the Cuban players decide to defect, many were observed “saluting” the flag.

  57. ManicMessiah says:

    An answer to the question: ‘Who on a football pitch would have a more coveted top than Leo Messi?’

  58. r says:

    I got nothing funny to add.

    all i can say is Dayumn. That streaker is hot. She has a nice bod.

  59. BK says:

    Guinness book entry #125,336:

    Most flagpoles erected at once: 10,213

  60. CD says:

    Fidel tuning in after the defections:

    “Even with the American flag on, I’d hit that.”

  61. Mark says:

    After years of research, US Soccer finally deploys their secret “weapon” against the young Hondurans: a drunken white chick wearing a smile, a flag and little else…

  62. Eugene says:

    Golazo!

  63. patrick says:

    Ives,

    Not sure if you know but, the Big Lead linked to this thread, for the pic of the streaker. THat should boost the hits, Thebiglead is a great sportsblog with a big following

  64. John Godfrey says:

    Brandi Chastain’s attempt to revive her career kicks into high gear.

  65. DDT5583 says:

    The USA misses yet another prime scoring chance

  66. Justice says:

    This member of Sam’s Army doesn’t quite grasp the concept of “going commando”.

    or

    This takes the term “hardcore” support to a whole new level.

    or!!!!

    Shortly after this excited supporter took the field, calls of “Man On! filled the Stadium”.

  67. KennyWoo says:

    Who’d she exchange jerseys with after the game?

  68. Jim says:

    Soccer

    From Victorias Secret’s

  69. Gilly73 says:

    What’s the difference between soccer in the USA & the rest of the world?

    In the USA we streak with our panties on

  70. bill says:

    >>Justice, I love your third option! “Shortly after this excited supporter took the field, calls of “Man On! filled the Stadium”.

    Hilarious!!

  71. Brant says:

    You wanted the US to score more in the tournament… I’m only here to help.

  72. David Berger says:

    Don Garber: Damn! I gotta bring back the Mutiny!

  73. tokick says:

    Tiffany does 23.

  74. Amit says:

    Hey Wonder Woman, only your car is invisible!

  75. Chris says:

    So many Cubans defected they asked drunk women in the crowd to play for them.

  76. Seisco says:

    As you can see by the fans reactions, Americans are disgusted and appalled at the soccer tradition of streaking.

  77. hipi says:

    “Some half naked female HIPI’ just run cross the field fi gi the game some life.She look hot to say the least… ”

    From: link to thereggaeboyz.com

  78. MasterShake says:

    Amada Guevarra’s wife is happy to be in America again.

  79. tommymcb says:

    “Tampa woman shows off her cankles”

  80. Scott says:

    -Cheap Tickets to the game $15.00

    -Front row tickets on the night a streaker shows up $50.00

    -Being the cameraman 10 feet from the streaker with a $20,000 camera that has 100 times HD optical zoom…..Priceless

  81. jstlouis says:

    The REAL “American Idol”.

  82. Justice says:

    If she were the opposing goalkeeper, I’d crash her box? :-x sorry ives, couldn’t resist…

  83. Richard says:

    Jim Rome: “When did I say soccer sucked?”

  84. Arsenal_RPB says:

    Joga Bonito

  85. Mike Caramba says:

    The U-23 Boys’ National Team quickly becomes the U-23 Men’s National Team

  86. Mike Caramba says:

    Christopher Sullivan compliments streaker’s “tanga”

  87. hdtv says:

    sam’s army just got a whole lot bigger…

  88. CD says:

    To honor your country ladies and gentlemen please rise and direct your attention to the flag barer on the field.

  89. Eric says:

    No caption, but just wanted to say I think this picture of the incident is even funnier: link to blogs.orlandosentinel.com

    Posted by: Joamiq | March 18, 2008 at 04:42 PM

    That picture just proves what I’ve always suspected. Hunter Freeman bats for the other team.

  90. PCFC says:

    U-23 Men’s National Team and Nike announce that nylon shorts are no longer suitable for gameplay…due to a hardening situation, more durable attire is needed.

  91. Arriaga says:

    Miami’s bid for an MLS team was strengthened today when a female activist demonstrated the southeast’s need for a club with a streaker specific stadium.

  92. Briggs says:

    Newest member of the “Greatest Team You Have Never Heard Of” endures a little rookie hazing.

  93. Lloyd Heilbrunn says:

    I understand Chad Barrett tried to grab her to give her a kiss, but she bounced off 10 yards…..

  94. Zungazan says:

    McCarty’s mom embarrasses poor Dax yet again…

  95. LA Metro says:

    God bless America.

  96. The Fly One says:

    She saw one picture of former governor Spitzer and was caught running the opposite direction…

  97. Daniel says:

    Sepp Blatter’s original idea of female football players wearing hot pants just got reduced.

  98. Charlie N. says:

    In a crazy turn of events, Hope Solo runs on to the field yelling,” I wanna play keeper, I wanna play keeper.”

  99. Beech says:

    I don’t really have a comment but the looks on all the boys faces in the crowd says it all.

  100. HE from NJ says:

    Suspiciously after the ‘streaker’ incident Governor Spitzer announces that after a long career in politics, he intends to follow a career in soccer.

  101. White Kix says:

    US Soccer finally figures out how to get Latino Americans to support the US team.

    The Honduras fans in the section next to me at the game started Chanting “U.S.A.” when she ran on the field. The whole game the US and Honduras sections were yelling at eachother. But she United us.

  102. inkedAG says:

    Play some Freebird, man!!!!

  103. mutinyfan says:

    trying to show hugh hefner she is match fit

  104. Kim says:

    “It puts the lotion on its skin”

  105. mrcjanssen says:

    The actual headline from MLS net says it all:

    Ssueno MLS 08 Getting Tighter

  106. Roman says:

    George Bush’s original plan for spreading democracy.

  107. Artie says:

    Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome the new mascot for your Los Angeles Galaxy!

  108. GD says:

    Unlike other stations who turn the cameras away, FSC focuses on the tail end of this intrusion onto the field.

  109. tommymcb says:

    Nice thighs. No felonies. She looks like a good pick up.

  110. chupacabra says:

    Sorry Tiffany. We go to the Olympics with the back line we’ve got, not the back end we want.

  111. BigJake says:

    “I can score faster than these guys!”

  112. dan says:

    Has the Designated Player rule changed already?

  113. TFC OZZ says:

    RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! THE CANADIANS ARE COMING! BURN THE HOUSE DOWN, AND HEAD FOR THE HILLS!

  114. Ev says:

    Tiffany…May I

  115. Ike says:

    I think the flag is UP, finally the offsides trap worked!

  116. Paul Lorinczi says:

    “Posted by: Whitescandal |

    For the man without $4300 to spend.”

    Brilliant! That’s funny!